Personal Change
Where it all began.....
I have spent years trying to hide this photo or act like it never existed. Sometimes I look at it wondering if this was really a stage in my life that I went through. Sometimes I look at it wondering if I have even really ever changed. Most times, I just never look at it. This photo has remained hidden in my desk drawer for almost 10 years.
Well today, I have decided to share it with you all. My hope is that you are motivated by my story to keep pressing toward the goals you have. Maybe quarantine has made me share it or maybe it is just time in my own head to grasp that that is not me anymore , who knows. But it is out there for the world to see (or the small number of readers that I have).
Either way here is my story:
This photo was taken circa 2008, I think. I had graduated from high school and in hot pursuit of I'm pretty sure nothing. Most of my friends had left for college, while I stayed home. I no longer had sports that I regularly participated in or friends I regularly spent time with. All I knew was that I needed something with some kind of direction. In that time of uncertainty in life, I did absolutely nothing. I went to class, work and that was about it. I found comfort in my food and in doing nothing. Despite all of that, get this, my major was athletic training.....wait what? I felt as though I would be lying to everyone to try to display this lifestyle of athleticism when I had none of that. I had to take a health and wellness class my freshman year as part of my general education class. In there, I was met by a professor who was an athletic trainer. Let me just tell you, she did not resemble health and wellness, from there I knew I did not want that to be me. I wanted my athletes, whenever I got to that point, to respect me by the way I lived my life. I realized something HAD to change. Let me just say, that may have been the only class I tried to apply to my life every single day.
I would be lying to you if I told you that it has been fun and easy throughout the years. God, would strike me dead right here and now if those words were typed out on this page. Health and wellness is hard, with a capital HARD! There are three key things that I have attributed to making it this far:
Support
Discipline
Mental Health
I do want to share with you how each of these three components have helped me through the years. I hope that they could for you too.
Support: My initial decision to change my lifestyle, I kept a secret. I did tell my dad that I need to change our eating for a school project ( he bought it). He was mind blown by how many vegetables I made us eat on a daily basis, because what freshman in college asks to eat more vegetables. *This one* As I started down this road, I would talk a little more and more with everyone about how I was adding exercise into my life or changing certain things that I was eating. They were all on board and would help keep me accountable. Now that I am older, there is a growing concern of more serious issues like diabetes in my life so I talk more about why I choose to do the things I do for that purpose. But it is always important to have at least one person that knows what you want to do to help keep you focused. Now you do not need a drill sergeant but someone that gets it because they care about your life just as much as you do. Find at least one person!
Discipline: I am a sucker for candy and all things sweet. Let it be known that I have the biggest sweet tooth in all of the world (maybe not in the world, but probably close). I like to think that I am very disciplined but I am not all the time. I definitely make conscious decisions on how everything is going to affect my body. But to say that I am disciplined every single day, I would be lying. I do give it my best effort. A few things that I try keep my disciplined while being self accountable would be keeping a schedule or routine. I am a planner by nature so my calendar is always filled out on Sunday. I plan out everything from individual meetings, to snacks throughout the day, to when I plan to workout. This allows me to be able to know when my gym bag should be packed or mentally prepare to drive to the gym after work. If you are someone who, by nature, is a planner. Try planning out when you are going to go to the gym each week. Once it is written down, stick with it and do not deviate from the plan.
Mental Health: No matter what you decide to do in life you need to be in the right headspace. You need to have a clear goal with a clear understanding on what it will take to make it happen. For the longest time, I was focused on a number on the scale. Then it turned into a focus on my fitness. Then ultimately it turned into how I feel every single day. Are any of these the right headspace, probably not. But I will tell you for sure the first two are not the best place to be mentally. You will quickly fail working towards your goals. Weight loss played a lot of games in my head, it still does to this day. But photos like the one above reminds you where you currently are and where you used to be. Two key components to keeping your mind clear are journals and your support system. Those two things really helped me be reminded that my weight loss was behind me and now in front of me is to maintain my health and wellness. Journals allows you to get out every negative thought about your day. In my opinion, if you keep things bottled up in your mind you have no space to allow positive things to grow.
My question to you is where is your head? Are you focused on a number? Are you focused on a weight to lift? Or are you focused on how you feel? Do you even know how you feel today? If you do not even know how you feel today, then you have nothing to compare to a bad day?
Application:
Gain an understanding of what a bad day feels like for you
Gain an understanding of how you feel on a really good day
From there you know what is good and what is bad so that you know how to have more good days than bad.
Overall, health and wellness is a journey. A journey that never really ends. But along the way you hit major milestones that are reminds that your hard work is worth it. That whatever your goal is, you are worth it.
Keep it up and never quit. Remember just try to be the better version of yesterday.
